The Decolonial Parent

a continuous work in progress

  • how we cloth diaper

    how we cloth diaper

    Maybe we got lucky but we feel like it has been pretty easy to cloth diaper our baby. We decided early on in pregnancy that we were going to give it our best shot, and spoke to a lot of parents who started then stopped or who intended to cloth diaper but then didn’t. Based…

  • notes from confinement

    notes from confinement

    These are the incomplete ramblings of a new parent in the first weeks of my child’s life. Questions welcome!

  • working during pregnancy

    working during pregnancy

    It’s wild that we expect pregnant people to be full-time economic actors during their entire pregnancy. With how gross, destabilising, hormonally chaotic, and simply painful pregnancy is, we still expect people to show up to a job and perform its responsibilities as if they weren’t a living, breathing chrysalis with a solar storm raging within.

  • Learning from my own lessons

    Learning from my own lessons

    Speaking personally, the hardest thing to reconcile growing up mixed was the way my European (and religiously Christian) parent dismissed a lot of my Asian parent’s cultural observances with religious logic. Whilst faith and festivals are often intertwined, it’s still possible to celebrate the festivals and what they teach us about our history and culture.…

  • Why I’m doing postpartum confinement

    Why I’m doing postpartum confinement

    Yes, the truth is that I am under no obligation to do a postpartum confinement. I am not fully Chinese, my partner’s family is not Chinese, and I don’t live in a Chinese community. There is no social or cultural expectation that I would follow any Chinese traditions of any kind (including all those feast…

  • Race and Culture, Race or Culture?

    Race and Culture, Race or Culture?

    Recently, a couple of conversations have arisen in various circles I frequent that I feel kinda uniquely positioned to speak to. I grew up mixed both racially and culturally, and the extent to which both have shaped me is informing the ways I plan to navigate these issues with my own children. This will be…

  • Release and Ready

    Release and Ready

    Do you have a point of focus for the year ahead yet? It’s not for everyone, but I typically find it helpful to sit quietly with my thoughts at the turn of the calendar page. This can take any form: barefoot during the silence of a new morning with a hot cup of tea and…

  • Evolving as Keepers of Culture

    Evolving as Keepers of Culture

    We’ve had a lot of conversations around here of late about what it means to be immigrant carriers of culture, and the dissonance of returning to your homeland after years abroad. Typically, the culture there has evolved and updated with the times, whilst often the culture carried abroad has ossified and become outdated. Our cultural…

  • Where we’ve come from

    Where we’ve come from

    As we look forward to raising our child in this complex and confusing world, we think it’s important to have a clear picture of how we ended up here. Coming from completely different worlds ourselves, we’ve somehow navigated our way to each other to build a life that reflects our values and nurtures our dreams.…

  • Take what serves you and leave the rest

    Take what serves you and leave the rest

    I’ll probably write about this a few times over the next month-to-a-year, as it’s a topic close to my heart. For today, I want to focus on the idea that when we honour traditions we need to adhere to them. While on the one hand I absolutely agree with and advocate for the notion that…

  • Imposter syndrome

    Imposter syndrome

    Some people may ask, Who are we to write a blog on parenting when we haven’t given birth yet? And that’s a fair question.

  • How it begins

    How it begins

    One minute we were out here living our dual freelancer lives, doing our best to navigate the vagaries of a novel bureaucratic system in a language we have a feeble grasp of (at best). Within moments, we became custodians of a whole new future. Over the coming months, we’ll be preparing our home and our…

Figuring it out too? We’d love to hear from you!